Creative Response

Last Saturday (November 28) we had our very first official (Review) Cuddle Party on the east coast of Sweden here in Uppsala. Needless to say, I was somewhat nervous but reminding myself of the intention to help others co-create a wonderful and heartfelt experience kept the usual in such cases anxiety at bay.

To be honest, facilitating this Cuddle Party was easy and enjoyable just as eating one of those blueberry muffins that were so appreciated. People of different ages, from different paths of life and cultures, showed up curious and open for this new experience.

I can imagine that doing it in familiar surroundings and with the people most of whom I know and who were determined to have a wonderful experience and to support me, is altogether a different thing than facilitating with a group of strangers. The people I didn't know I met in person before or spoke on the phone with a few times. However, they were strangers to one another if only for a very short while. I was moved by how fast we all became sort of a family for the evening. None of us knew what it would be like, what this particular event would lead to but were willing to step outside the comfort zone and meet the unknown because curiosity and openness were stronger. I was also reminded of how we all can become co-creators of our individual and collective experience by actively engaging with what arises in ourselves (emotions of different kind, thoughts, desires) and allowing others to do the same and Cuddle Party offers a great opportunity for exploring this.

Be with those who help your being.
Don't sit with indifferent people, whose breath
comes cold out of their mouths.
Not these visible forms, your work is deeper.

- Rumi

It was inspiring and touching to see how people who were relative strangers to each other just an hour ago cared for one another so much. Because of this harmony in the group I did not get or rather did not take the opportunity to practice saying no (although we did that in the workshop part, as an exercise) as much as I’d hoped I would. While preparing the event and inviting people most of whom I knew I received quite a few nos and most of them came from the people I’d hoped would say yes. This was my chance to practice the guidelines of Cuddle Party to create space for an authentic and powerful answer, whatever that could be and not to take no personally. So while I could benefit from practising to say no (hear myself say it looking the other person in the eye and letting them take care of their own feelings) as well as receive it, for that particular event I chose to go with the flow and receive yes for a change since this is what I needed at the time. For the next event I might set a different intention depending where I am at.

Likewise, during the preparation stage, I got a few maybes when people actually meant no but did not voice it like that for one reason or another and let me hang in the air uncertain if I should contact them again or not. One of my favourite guidelines at a Cuddle Party - "when you are a maybe say no" followed by "You are encouraged to change your mind" – is something I would really want to see more of in our society and in all our daily interactions. This would save us all time and energy and give us more choice.

On the bonus side decorating the space for this event gave me new ideas as to what my living room could look like so that I would want to use it for my own relaxation and having friends over.

Sunday I declared to be my alone day and spent it watching films and drinking tea in my very own chill area, breathing out - a bliss. Am now processing the experience and charging for the Cuddle Parties to come. Look forward to connecting - many hearts, shared journey!